Like You Need Any: More Weird Reasons To Buy Cake

Need more excuses to eat cake, minions? Then I'VE GOT YA COVERED.

Why not celebrate:

The Birth of Man

A little esoteric perhaps, but if anyone asks, just say you're being sarcastic.

A Really Nice Meadow:

For those out standing in their fields.

Calling Dibs On The Front Passenger's Seat:

A Good Steak?

At least, I assume that's what this diagram is.
(Why celebrate steak with cake? Because cake is better than steak, duh.)

How Many Cakes You've Had:

So meta. I love it.

Anyone else wondering what your number would be? 'Cuz if we're counting slices from separate cakes, then the CW Book Tours alone mean I've got most of you beat. [Wistfully remembers the days when I got a slice of cake every night after each show.] Ahhh. Good times.

Hang on, I'm not sure this is something to be celebrated, but cake DOES help:

It better be chocolate.

In fact, this next one is a MUCH better occasion for cake, am I right, ladies?

HECK YEAH.

Thanks to Juliann B., Ramona R., Jennifer E., Julie S., Jennie R., Katy T., & Amanda M. for inspiring a generation of future hysterectomy cakes.

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P.S. That reminds me of my Wonder Womb DIY, but if you're not feeling crafty you can always buy this:

"Ivy the Plush Uterus"

I'm trying to figure out why it's named Ivy - why not Ursula or Stabby? - but all I've got is ivy's association with poison. Which, come to think of it, sounds about right. :p

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

In With The New

It's officially a new year, minions. A fresh start. A time to shake off the doldrums of 2024, and embrace the new adventures that await us in 2025.

Because you... are a unicorn.

A funky, pox-riddled unicorn.

...Or you could be mixed with a cheetah. Who also has the pox.

And baby, you... are a firework.

Or maybe a fountain.

Depends how much you've had to drink.

And just like a kite on the wind, you... can SOAR.

...or crash, burn, and poop your pants.

So raise a glass - or half a mermaid

And let those balloons drop!

Or... escape the picnic basket?

I'll admit, the metaphor's getting a little muddied here.

Whatever. My point is, this year, minions, don't hang on to the wreckage of 2024.

Instead, look forward to the wreckage of 2025. You know, like this:

PERFECT.

Thanks to Emma C., Kristine, Jessica C., Courtney R., Natalie K., & Greg T. for capturing the moment your daughter was pretty much all of us.

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P.S. Hey all you know what would make the new year better? Giant comfy monster slippers:

Monster Paw Slippers

I'm actually wearing big badger feet slippers at the moment, but they don't have much of an insole, so these look like a serious upgrade. Plus, extra ankle coverage. Mmmm.

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And from my other blog, Epbot: