Print Me A Picture

Today I’d like to complain about discuss your edible images, bakers, so first lets zip through the basics.

First things first, run spell check.

*facepalm* 

Off to a great start.

Next, properly trim your image:

... and place it smoothly on the cake.

Smoooooothly.

Make sure it's right side up!

And make sure all your color cartridges are full before printing.

If you do accidentally turn someone into Shrek's baby, do not - I repeat, do NOT - use it as your store's display cake.

[innocently begins whistling 'All Star']

Try to choose a cake design that frames the image well:

And remember that photo cakes are all about putting the birthday boy or girl front and center:

If you're making generic cakes for immediate sale, leave plenty of room around your image for the customer's message later:

And choose pictures that go with everything, nothing too specific.

Remember, photo cakes are supposed to be fun, dynamic, and above all, EXUBERANT.

Aw yeah. The Bonnest of Vonages is happening here, I can feel it.

So get on out there, bakers, and give us a big photo finish!

yay

Thanks to Spin, Heather D., Katrina, April S., Art, Julia J., Sam E., Victoria B., Angela J., Candace W., & Stacey B. for seeing the big picture, but only if she's reallllly close.

P.S. Here's an idea: instead of cakes, maybe we should be plastering our loved ones' faces on SOCKS:

Because oh yes, that's a thing you can do for $15.

(I never said it was GOOD idea. Pretty funny, though!)

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

No, I Won't Show You The Uncensored Version, So Don't Ask

Photopaper cakes are big again, bakers, so let's go over a few ground rules:

1) Stop doing this:

Just stop it.

Ground Rule The Second:

If the customer asks for a "cute train photo cake" for her 2-year-old, remember to include the word "cute" in your Google image search:

::sigh::

Ground Rule III: This Time It's Personal:

Look, I'm not saying a 13 year-old girl can't love a reality-show bounty hunter *and* frilly pastel flowers. I'm just saying maybe those two themes don't complement each other so well:

And finally, please, bakers, if you forget everything else, remember this:

ABSOLUTELY NO PHOTOS OF REAL HOO-HAWS WITH REAL BABIES COMING OUT OF THEM

Talk about your "flash photography." Heyooooo.

Though I'm sure the "lol" made it alllll better for the unsuspecting party-goers.

(The caption said it was for a "surprise baby shower." I'LL SAY.)

Thanks to Rebecca H., Silvia R., Eric M., & Adrienne G. for proving there IS such a thing as too much of a spread at parties.

*****

Hey, did you know you can have a baby shower with virtually no visible hoo-haws? It’s true!

HOO-HAW FREE BABY SHOWER DECOR

And from my other blog, Epbot: