That Personal Touch

When you start a new job it's always nice to feel welcomed. This lucky individual - who may or may not be named "Steve" - got a cake:

Supposedly that reads "Greetings Coworker," but it looks more like "Exploiker" to me. Regardless, it's nice to see a little Alien Robot lingo being used in the workplace. (Back in the day I was known to bleat out the occasional "EXTERMINATE!" when talking to the "parental units," but then a friend told me I was "too carbon-based" to pull off the 'bot vibe, so I stopped.)

If there's ever a time to celebrate your individuality, though, it's your birthday:

So remember, Chris's sister: You are unique. Just like the rest of Chris's siblings.

Of course, Chris's sister is older than Chris, so what do you suppose her first three birthday cakes read? "Happy Birthday, To-Be-Determined-Upon-the-Birth-of-Our-Next-Child?"

And for those picky people who want their actual names on a cake, bakeries are now offering some handy fill-in-the-blank form cakes:

Just pick out which awkwardly worded, misspelled message you would like, write in the name of your choice using the mismatched icing tube, and voila! One personalized, heartfelt Wreck!

Generic Wreckporter, Becky F., and Carmen, thanks for all wonderful Wrecks.

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Jen Pipes Down

Although the past few days have been fun, I think we're all ready to just let some Wrecks speak for themselves, don't you?

Wow. Very eloquent, Beth H. I never knew that "fithy years plus nine" equaled a "Happle Birthday." Or that random capitalization and periods (the punctuating kind, that is, not the monthly kind) were so in vogue these days. Maybe. i. should. Try. it.!.*

Ok, Monica S., I promise: As soon as I find some "underware", I'll remember to wear them.

Um. What?
Julie S., did this come with a translator?

Or not to cool?
That is the question, Jodee R.

Exclusionary cake really is the best kind:

Unless of course "But-Ringo" is some kind of unfortunate nickname. Which would make you wonder how exactly...uh...you know...

Yeah, maybe we shouldn't follow that thought train too far down the tracks, eh, Glynis E.? Yeah. Hey kids, just look at that ugly airbrushing! Woo wee, is that ugly! Haha!

*Hey, I just realized that when you combine a ! with two ..s, it looks kind of like a cute little chicken head. See? .!. No? Ok, I've officially been at this computer too long...

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