"Perfectly" Punctual

Yesterday we covered parentheses and quotation marks. Today, THE WORLD.

Or maybe just some extra apostrophes:

This Beth belongs to Congratutation.

The booties are anyone's guess.

 I see lots of apostrophes where quotation marks should be, but I have to admit, this is the first time I've seen it the other way around:

I blame whatever madness drove the baker to add that L.

You might think periods would be easy to deal with, but if so, you're obviously a man with a death wish.

Or this baker:

I don't really know who St. David is, but I'm hoping against hope he's the patron saint of punctuation.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is the three period run, or if you want to get all technical about it, the ellipsis:

Because nothing conveys sincerity quite like trailing off mid...

 With all these confusing options, you might be tempted to skip punctuation entirely, bakers. But that path has its own perils:

Yeah, way to go, Bob. I mean, that was soooo great, that thing you did. Scha.

 My personal favorite, though, is the wild card mish-mosh of punctuation patter:

I dare you to do a dramatic reading of this cake.

 And finally, the colon cake you've been waiting for:

Come back after we slice it for the semi-colons.

Thanks to Elizabeth C., Miriam A., Doreen L., Ariel F., Sarah C., Gernez, & Kim T. for the excuse to link to Victor Borge's phonetic punctuation.

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P.S. For those who take their coffee with extra snark:

"Silently Correcting Your Grammar" Coffee Mug
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And from my other blog, Epbot: