Prepare For ALL The "Horny" Jokes

Have you seen these new unicorn cakes going around?

They're adorable and fairly simple to make, so of course they're hugely popular. And talk about a gift to bakers! All you need are a plain round cake, a few flowers, some eyes, ears, and a horn. Boom.
Done.

How do you mess that up?

I'll answer that question with another question:

Unicorn horns: do they really NEED a point?

Yes, yes they do.

FUN FACT: I looked up "Horny" in my thesaurus, and no lie, one of the synonyms is "hot to trot." I can't even make this stuff up.

Of course, some might argue Mister Sex Ed* there has a horn that looks more like a cigar, but that's a fallacy. ('Cuz that's a phallus, see?)

Ooh, I just realized this cake gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "horsing around." Heyooo.

And to something that rhymes with "thickhead." Heyoooooo.

So the next time you feel like betting on the ponies, minions, just make sure your baker gets a grip, and doesn't blow it.

[*COME ON THAT WAS GENIUS... to everyone over the age of 40.]

Thanks to Diane C. for the excuse to write the Mister Ed pun my soul has always yearned for.

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I know it’s not even remotely Halloween, but as the owner of a black cat, I can tell you this one's appropriate year-round:

Cat's Got Your Knife T-Shirt

Lots more colors at the link.

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Our Childhoods, Cake Wrecked

I'll admit it, the fastest route to my wallet is straight through Nostalgia Land.

Yep, I will gleefully buy just about anything with the Stay Puft Marshmallow man on it, or Little Twin Stars, or baby Donald Duck. I'm also a sucker for Muppets and 90s cartoons.

But I gotta say, bakers, if you're going to prey on our devotion to childhood characters, it helps if we can at least RECOGNIZE them.

You know, like this:

Not this:

And like this:

Not this:

Something kind of like this?

...but not at all like this:

And finally, just as a reminder, Curious George is a playful little monkey:

...not the traumatized pig-man who will be haunting our dreams tonight:

Thanks to Dan B., Trish F., Leighanne M., & Ashley K. for bringing to mind that age old question: why DOES pig-man have a shiny black horn on his head?

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P.S. Anyone remember these?

(Spirograph Design Tin Set)

This is a smaller "travel size" kit that's only $13, but there's also a big deluxe set. I'm tempted to get one with some fun neon gel pens; I've watched people do these online and it looks so relaxing!

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And from my other blog, Epbot: