Happy Birthday Happy Birthday

Happy birthday, Happy Birthday song!

You know what's coming next.

[loudly and off key]

♫ Haaaaaappy... ♪

BIRDAY

...to you!

Haaaaaapppy

BISLHAY

...to you!

Haaaaaaaaaapppy...

Well, you get the idea.

('Butthday' is my favorite.)

Anyhoo:

Thanks to Lisa M., Kelsey D., Jason M., Stacie H., Melanie W., Whitney K., Ruth C., Rachel V., Jill, Dena, Carrie K., Tina W., & Rachel M., who I bet all agree with me that the birthday song is the worst. Along with anything else you're forced to sing at fellow adults in restaurants. And don't get me started on those funny paper hats. Have I mentioned I'm an introvert? DON'T SING TO ME. But leave the cake. And a fork. No, I'm not sharing. WHAT.

*****

In lieu of singing, may I suggest hanging this delightfully cat-astrophic birthday garland?

 Cat Face Birthday Banner

 The product photos are a wild ride all on their own, to be honest. Is the kid in the 4th pic supposed to be a cat? And how long did it take you to notice the gratuitously photoshopped kitten-holding-balloons in the "No-DIY Require" shot? Ha!

Kinda Gives A New Meaning To "Sunny Side Up"

They asked for a sportsball cake that said "Way To Go!"

They GOT a wedding cake that said:

"Way you go"

I love the lack of punctuation. It's basically the cake version of that unflappable old guy on a front porch watching the big action fight tumble down the street in front of him. "Yerp. Way you go."

And you KNOW I'm gonna milk this one for all its worth:

DON'T SAY 'A CURD.'

Which reminds me, did you know Monday was the Summer Solstice?

Um, that's "Solstice," bakers.

DANGIT, SOL.

And finally, here's a Wreck to the third power:

First, the customer spelled "farewell" wrong on the order form.

THEN the baker misspelled the misspelling on the actual cake.

Which gives us:

BEST. GOODBYE CAKE. EVER.

Thanks to Kristen B., John A., Vici R., Patti, & Meagan G. for reminding us failing well is ALWAYS an option.

*****

Speaking of failing well, I feel like this is the crowd to appreciate a book of really, REALLY bad taxidermy:

Crap Taxidermy, hardcover

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: