Cake Wrecks' Top 12 Unintentionally Erotic Cakes

Welcome, my fellow gutter-minded malcontents! Prepare to get your juvenile giggles on, because today, we are all 12-year-old boys.

Oh, the irony.

[insert Peter Pan joke here]

"AARG! HULK TENSE! HULK... TRY RELIEVE TENSION."

I bet this is the last time BJ's Wholesale Club abbreviates its name:

Anyone else getting kind of a dirty vibe off this butterfly?

(No seriously, why is the end dirty??)

IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK:

Unless you think that's supposed to be a bronze pear statue. Which it is. Allegedly.

Baby, You're A Firework!

...in need of medical attention.

The Girls' Night Out:

No, I mean literal girls. They're babies. In bed. With unusually pert pacifiers.

This was supposed to say, "Germany, here we come!"

Looks like "Germany" will be smacking the ceiling with a broom tonight.

A Very Happy Butterfly:

And an even happier frog:

THAT IS SO NOT RIGHT.

A Cake Wrecks classic, and one of my earliest posts:

I love that someone - either the customer or the decorator - felt that "sexual harassment" needed to be illustrated. And I realize the decorator can't be expected to be Picasso or anything, but check out how far the girl's feet are off the ground. Either that was the Spank Heard 'Round the World, or she's on an invisible step while Chuckles there digs for gold.

And finally, one older still:

GOOD LUCK IN CHINA!

If you haven't read the full back story by Scott of Basic Instructions - who has since become both a dear friend and an excellent author, btw - grab a tissue for the tears of laughter, and go check it out.

Good stuff.

Thanks to Melissa M., Mark F., Steve S., Lesley W., Diana M., Elisabeth M., Gina C., Sarah R., Bijan P., & Melanie D. for making so many people giggle-snort as quietly as possible while at work. (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.)

Fun And Poo-Wangs For The Whole Family!

Happy Thanksgiving, minions!

Since you might not be hanging with family today, I've decided to give you the gift that keeps on giving: Turkey Poo-Wangs.

Lots and lots of Turkey Poo-Wangs.

Ahh, but not just ANY Turkey Poo-Wangs; today I give you Turkey Poo-Wangs that remind you of your family members.

Was there a lot of stiff competition? Of course. Is this kinda ballsy? Heck yeah. Will there be more phallic jokes? Let's find out.

 

The Angry Poop-Head:

"Why is the rum always gone?!"

 

The "I'm Trying To Watch The Game In Here!"

ElizabethFri-ow-turkey.jpg

"Keep it down! I can't hear the score!"

 

The Dazed And Confused:

JacquelineGof.ow.thanksgiving2086.jpg

"WHAT year is it?!"

 

The "Isn't it Wonderful We're All Here Together?"

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"Group hug!"

 

The Sarcastic One:

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"Sure, Aunt Barb, I'll get riiiight on working on my attitude."

 

The "Please nobody notice I'm a Gingerbread Man."

AmyWym.ow.turkey.jpg

[uncomfortable, fidgety silence]

 

The Little Prick:

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"MOM says I'm special. MOM says I can have all the pie I want. MOO-OOOOM!!"

 

The "Nobody Talk To Me It's Been A Long Day."

dimitrasko.ow.pooturkey.jpg

"Just... just give him the pie, Barb."

 

The Peace Maker:

StephanieBak-FB-flamingturkey.jpg

"Now, Stu, I'm sure you didn't mean all [REDACTED] are stupid... right?"

 

And finally,

The "Send Help, Or At Least More Pie."

JasonLev-FB-Turkeywang.jpg

Come one, get a grip, you guys. Day's almost through.

 

Thanks to Vanessa R., Elizabeth F., Jacqueline G., Erin F., Joyce J., Amy W., Subdo, Dimitra, Stephanie B., & Jason L. for recommending we all Wang Chung tonight.

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