5 Kids' Cakes So Creepy They're Actually Hilarious

[dramatic announcer voice]

From the wreckers who brought you... Monkey Ball!

Handsy McStrangles-A-Lot:

Bee-Elzebub:

Ham Head!

And this candle:

Comes the most terrifying children's birthday cake of 2014.

She's not here to be sweet.

She's not here to be your friend.

She's here...

["But mooo-ooooom! I want a PRINCESS CAKE!!"]

...for just desserts.

Thanks to Deirdre M., Anony M., Charesse, Tiffany Z., Emma P. (who found the candle in a vintage cake decorating manual), & Angela F. for the perfect princess-craze antidote.

*****

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And from my other blog, Epbot: